Now this has been quite painful. A couple of real turd pickles in this list. Stay clean people.
10. Ready Player One (2018)
From the book by Spielberg sycophant, Ernest Cline, this is a thousand island dressing of a film, sitting near the top of the nostalgiabation genre. Functional at best.
9. The Shape of Water (2017)
Ticking almost every 'worthy' box but sadly avoiding the 'original story' one, del Toro dangled his bait and awards committees around the world devoured it. Disappointing shite.
8. Bright (2017)
Alien Nation rip off with Big Willy unconvincingly going through the motions. Nice ideas but badly executed.
7. Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)
Way too pleased with itself. Nonsense masquerading as cool.
6. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
Boring and derivative. This series would need to set up a love triangle involving the two leads and an Ankylosaurus for me to stay interested.
5. Justice League (2017)
Better than the DC tripe from previous years but not by much. And where were the Wonder Twins and Gleek?
4. Tomb Raider (2018)
Unnecessary reboot, with a perfunctory story and tepid action scenes.
3. Tales from Earthsea (2006)
An interminably dull animation from the usually solid Ghibli studios. Confusing and sleep-inducing, this is easily their worst film.
2. Manhunt (2017)
If it weren't for the following this would have romped it in for Warm Norman of the year. Hang you head Mr. Woo, this was truly awful. And Masaharu Fukuyama wouldn't look out of place in the entry below...
1. The Room (2003)
Oh, hi Mark. A non-film if there ever was one. And don't try that old 'so bad, it's good' bollocks. This was way beyond bad. Jafar Panahi once made a film called This is Not a Film. Well, here's the actual thing. Fuck right off. Listen to "Best and Worst of 2018" on Spreaker.
10. Ready Player One (2018)
From the book by Spielberg sycophant, Ernest Cline, this is a thousand island dressing of a film, sitting near the top of the nostalgiabation genre. Functional at best.
9. The Shape of Water (2017)
Ticking almost every 'worthy' box but sadly avoiding the 'original story' one, del Toro dangled his bait and awards committees around the world devoured it. Disappointing shite.
8. Bright (2017)
Alien Nation rip off with Big Willy unconvincingly going through the motions. Nice ideas but badly executed.
7. Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)
Way too pleased with itself. Nonsense masquerading as cool.
6. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
Boring and derivative. This series would need to set up a love triangle involving the two leads and an Ankylosaurus for me to stay interested.
5. Justice League (2017)
Better than the DC tripe from previous years but not by much. And where were the Wonder Twins and Gleek?
4. Tomb Raider (2018)
Unnecessary reboot, with a perfunctory story and tepid action scenes.
3. Tales from Earthsea (2006)
An interminably dull animation from the usually solid Ghibli studios. Confusing and sleep-inducing, this is easily their worst film.
2. Manhunt (2017)
If it weren't for the following this would have romped it in for Warm Norman of the year. Hang you head Mr. Woo, this was truly awful. And Masaharu Fukuyama wouldn't look out of place in the entry below...
1. The Room (2003)
Oh, hi Mark. A non-film if there ever was one. And don't try that old 'so bad, it's good' bollocks. This was way beyond bad. Jafar Panahi once made a film called This is Not a Film. Well, here's the actual thing. Fuck right off. Listen to "Best and Worst of 2018" on Spreaker.
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